gotta have faith!

Friday, August 25, 2006

Another day wasted.

WASTED.
WASTED.
WASTED.




















WASTED.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

TIKBALANG

Tao ang pang-ibabang bahagi ng katawan, kabayo naman ang pang-itaas. Ang mahiwagang nilalang na nagliligaw sa mga manlalakbay, at upang matagpuan ng manlalakbay ang tamang landas, kailangang baliktarin niya ang kanyang suot na damit.
Ang parehong engkantong bumisita sa aking pagliliwaliw sa mundo ng panaginip noong nakaraang gabi...

Naibalita sa tv na may kumakalat na grupo ng mga tikbalang sa Muñoz, at unti-unting tinatahank ang daan papuntang Proj. 7, kung saan kami nakatira ngayon. Matapos mapanood ang nakagigimbal na balita, dali-dali kong sinara ang lahat ng bintana at pinto ng aming bahay. Hindi ko alam kung saan nagpunta ang mga kuya at ate ko, kaya ako na lang ang umako ng responsibilidad nila para alagaan ang mga nakababata kong kapatid at mga pamangkin. Hindi ko sila pinalalapit sa bintana man o pinto (pero sadyang makukulit sila at sinusubukan pa talagang buksan ang mga bintana). Maya-maya, may kumatok. Isang babaeng nagpapakilalang Tita Rosaura raw namin siya. (Sa realidad, wala talaga akong matandaang Tita Rosaura, pero dahil panaginip yun, hindi naman kami tumanggi na tita nga namin siya.) Si Tita Rosaura ay bihasa sa mga bulaklak, at may nalalaman siyang pananggalang sa mga tikbalang na nagkalat sa lugar namin. Binigyan niya kami ng isang kuwintas ng bulaklak at sinabing oras na nadikit iyon sa tikbalang, mawawala ito ng parang bula. Isinabit ng nanay ko ang kuwintas sa may pinto at nakaramdam kami ng kaunting paggaan ng loob sa proteksyong tangan ni Tita Rosaura.

Nang biglang may sunud-sunod na malalakas na katok ang narinig namin. Isang lalaking humahangos ang humihingi ng tulong kay Tita Rosaura dahil sa pag-atake ng mga tikbalang sa lugar nila. Hindi naman tumanggi ang aming tiyahin, sumama siya agad, at kasama ng aking nanay pati na ang lalaki, pinuntahan agad nila ang lugar. Habang nandun ang nanay ko at tiyahin sa lugar na may mga tikbalang, nakatulog ako sa paghihintay. Sa panaginip ko, ang lalaking humingi ng tulong kay Tita Rosaura ay isa palang tikbalang na nagbabalat-kayong tao upang makuha ang aking tiyahin at gawing sakripisyo sa kanilang ritwal. Pinatay nila si Tita Rosaura at inialay sa isang altar, habang ang grupo ng mga tikbalang ay nagdiriwang sa espektakulong nagaganap. Ang nanay ko naman ay sapilitang ginawang tikbalang. Pagkagising ko sa aking panaginip, pinuntahan ko agad ang aking tatay upang sabihin ang tungkol dito, dahil nararamdaman kong hindi lang ito panaginip, ngunit isang pangitain. Tiningnan ako ng tatay ko na parang natanggalan ako ng isang turnilyo sa utak, pero hindi naman niya binale wala ang mga sinabi ko.

Dumating ang nanay ko kasama ang lalaki, ngunit wala na si Tita Rosaura. Hindi ko na inungkat kung nasaan si Tita, dahil alam na alam ko na kung ano ang nangyari sa kanya. Binantayan ko ang bawat kilos nila, at napansing kong may pagkabalisa ang mga galaw nila. Pilit kinukuha na nanay ko ang mga nakababata kong kapatid at pamangkin pero hindi ko pinayagan, bagkus, pinapunta sa tatay ko. Sa hindi ko nalalamang dahilan, may salo-salong nagaganap sa may sala, at nandon ang aking ilang kamag-anakan. Habang nasa sala kaming lahat, napatunayan ko na hindi na nga tao ang nanay ko at ang lalaki. Nakita ko na hugis-tikbalang ang kanilang mga anino. Madali kong sinabi sa aking tatay ang aking natuklasan at agad na naniwala. Habang nag-iisip ng plano ang aking ama, tinawag ko ang aking kapatid at pinahanap ang bulaklak na binigay ng aming tiyahin na sinasabing panlaban sa mga tikbalang. Tinuro ng aking kapatid ang bulaklak sa may sulok, nakita niya kasing sinubukang hawakan ng aming ina ang bulaklak pero mukha siyang napaso. Humangos akong pumunta sa sulok at hinati sa dalawa ang kuwintas. Pinuntahan ko ang lalaki at idinikit sa kanyang balat ang kalahati ng kuwintas: unti-unting nawala ang lalaki. Matapos nitong mawala, nilapitan ko ang aking nanay at idinampi ang natitirang kalahati ng kuwintas sa kanyang kamay. Sa pagkakataong iyon, napaiyak ako sa unti-unting pagkalaho ng aking nanay. Ngunit bago siya tuluyang maglaho...

Nilapitan niya ang aking ama at dinampi ang bulaklak at nasindak sa nangyari. Unti-unti ring nawala ang aking ama. Isa na rin pala siyang tikbalang. Ang taong pinagsasabihan ko ng tungkol sa pagbabagong naganap sa aking ina at kina Tita at ng lalaki, ay isa na rin palang tikbalang! Bago naglaho ang tatay ko, tinanong ko kung bakit siya naging tikbalang. Aniya, "Ako mismo ang lumapit sa mga tikbalang upang gawin nila akong katulad nila...dahil isa na ring tikbalang ang tunay kong minamahal." At ang taong tinutukoy ng tatay ko ay hindi ang nanay ko.

Bago pa man tuluyang maglaho ang tatay ko, nilapitan niya ang isa kong tiyahin, si Ateng Glo, at katulad ng ginawa ng nanay ko sa kanya, ay dinampi ang nasabing bulaklak sa kanyang mukha. Tulad ng nangyari sa ina't ama ko, at sa lalaki, dahan-dahan ding naglaho si Ateng Glong.

At naramdaman kong nag-iisa ako, sa gitna ng salo-salo sa amin, sa gitna ng mga halakhakan ng mga tiyahin at tiyuhin ko.

Isa ito sa mga panaginip na hinding-hindi ko makakalimutan, isang pakikipag-uganayan sa mahigawang nilalang sa mundo ng panaginip.

At hanggang hindi ko pa nalalaman kung ano ang ibig sabihin, ay patuloy na babagabag at magiging laman ng aking malikot na imahinasyon...

Friday, August 18, 2006

FOCUS.

1. Don't let others distract you.
2. Assigned tasks should be finished on time, at the same time, quality should not be sacrificed.
3. DON'T DISTRACT OTHERS AS WELL.




FOCUS...



FOCUS...





FOCUS.

Thursday, August 17, 2006

I'm just plain happy.



Happiness



Happiness is two kinds of ice cream
Finding your skate key, telling the time

Happiness is learning to whistle
Tying your shoe for the very first time

Happiness is playing the drum in your own school band
And happiness is walking hand in hand

Happiness is five different crayons
Knowing a secret, climbing a tree

Happiness is finding a nickel
Catching a firefly, setting him free

Happiness is being alone every now and then
And happiness is coming home again

Happiness is morning and evening
Daytime and nighttime, too
For happiness is anyone and anything at all
That's love by you.

Happiness is having a sister
Sharing a sandwich, getting along

Happiness is singing together when day is through
And happiness is those who sing with you

Happiness is morning and evening
Daytime and nighttime, too
For happiness is anyone and anything at all
Thats love by you. :)











Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Sana dumating ang panahon...

  • na hindi na lang iisang anino ang bumabagtas ng daan ko pauwi.
  • na kahit walang kumot sa malamig na gabi, may katawang nakadampi sa katawan ko na siyang pagmumulan ng init.
  • na hindi na lang iisang tao ang nakasukob sa payong ko.
  • na hindi lang ako ang matutuyo sa paggamit ng payong ko.
  • na may kasama akong hihiga sa sunken garden habang umuulan.
  • na may kasalo ako sa pagkain sa umaga, tanghali, gabi, kahit hindi masarap ang kinakain.
  • na may mukhang tatambad sa akin pagsapit ng umaga.
  • na may isang taong hindi mahihiyang hawakan ang kamay ko saan man kami magtungo, sino man ang kaharap namin.
  • na hindi mangangakong mamahalin ako panghabambuhay, bagkus pinipiling mahalin ako sa bawat araw na dadaan.

Monday, August 14, 2006

One of the things I regret...




















Never had a chance to say goodbye to John, my elementary MU (he was in 6th grade while i was in 4th grade, and yaz, aware na ako sa mga bagay na yun ng ganoong edad ;p ) and now my friend (thanks to Friendster, and after almost 10 years I found this guy again). He's in LA now, was surprised that he migrated jsut last week of August without even meeting me. He said it was a quick notice, he had just a week to prepare. He texted me, just to meet me one more time, coz it'd be a long time for us to see each other again, but apparently I didn't get it (I didn't even know he has a plan of migrating) for some unknown reason. Sigh. Will miss this guy... One great guy. Pag nagkita tayo, pareho na tayong gurang, may asawa, at may kiddies, ahihihi. I'll just cherish all those kilig moments with you when we were still young and innocent (but now, not anymore, haha), and hope you do, too. Naalala mo pa ba yung nangyari nung tumawag ka at si Papa nakasagot? Ahaha. Owell, dazlayp. ;) Take care though (Ingat sa mga chikabebis jan, I'm sure magiging kilabot ka ng mga Kana, ahahaha!).

Just remember, you'll always have a special place in my heart John, always. ;)

Sabi nga ni Kuya Germs...




















WALANG TULUGAN!!!

Argh. Another week of sleepless nights. *Sighs*

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Taktaktak.

Ang tunog ng patak ng ulan sa sisidlan.
Taktaktak.
Parang hunghang na nakatunganga sa kawalan.
Hinihintay mapuno ang laman.
Inaabangan ang paggalaw ng mga kamay ng orasan.
Taktaktak.
Isang nunong nakapayong sa gitna ng karimlan.
Nagmamasid, nakikinig, nakikiramdam.
May dumaang sasakyan.
May taong naglakad sa katabing lansangan.
Kidlat at kulog ay sinabayan.
Isang orkestrang may himig
Ng pag-iisa. Taktak.
Ng kabaliwan. Taktak.
Ng kalungkutan. Taktak.

Patuloy ang pagbuhos ng ulan.
Lumalakas, humihina, ngunit hindi pa rin namamaalam.
Kaluluwang naghahanap ng karamay ay sinamahan.
Tila sinasagot ang mga katanungang bumabagabag sa kamalayan.
At ang nuno'y nakiisa sa lupang sumisipsip ng biyayang nilalaan.
Taktaktak.

















Salamat ulan.
Taktak.

A Series of Unfortunate Events




















  1. Lost wallet with my remaining salary, atm card, health insurance card, last copy of my grad pic and creative pose pics (pati sa classmates), my hand-written phone book, video city card, laking national card (and yes, almost 3 years din yun)
  2. SHOULD have gotten my new atm card last Friday, but the pin number was not working yet, so I wasn't able to get it. Kamusta naman, lapit na sweldo.
  3. Was planning to pass a lab report at the ECCE dept last Aug 12, Saburday, 12 nn, but wasn't able to coz I was in the office working my ass off. Planned to send it to a classmate and let him pass it, but wasn't able to coz there's no MS Office and even Openoffice there (can't be installed either) and I couldn't open the file to finish it.
  4. 20% of the total grade of #3 will be deducted EACH day including holidays and weekends. Must be passed with signature of the ecce department, day and time of submission. Luckily, the dept is only open half day on saburdays. SHOULD pass this monday, highest possible score is 60%. And the passing score?60%. Kamusta naman dabah.
  5. Went to a dental office near the office (and used my dental insurance). Dentist said there's a possibility for a root canal. 2K per root x 3 roots, so 6K overall. It's because my previous dentist didn't really do a good pasta job, some decay remained inside the pasta. Ugh. I hope that the dentist wouldn't have to do some root canal after I receive the xray results.
  6. Arrived dripping-wet at the office two consecutive days (pati panty ko muntikan ng mabasa).
  7. Newly-bought umbrella now ruined.
  8. Hurt my thigh with a pair of pliers while fixing my umbrella.
  9. Sipon sipon sipon. Clocked out early the past two days. Less work hours. Less salary.
  10. Research mode not yet over.
  11. Slept two hours a day for the past few days.
  12. Butas ang wallet.
  13. Haven't done any programming assignment due this week.

Help! I need somebody... Help! Not just anybody...Help! I need someone...Help~~~

Saturday, August 12, 2006

The Five People You Meet in Heaven

Every little thing you do, big or small, has always an effect to somebody. A string connects each one of us: a person's action that happened in the past, is happening at the present, and will happen in the future, conscious or not, has a significant part to another person's life. AND the other person's life or death depends on that single action.

These are some of the insights I have gotten from the book "The Five People You Meet in Heaven". I can't remember who the author is, but he's the same author of "Tuesdays with Morrie". When I started reading the book, I just couldn't stop reading it until the end. It's the kind of book you'll definitely read in one sitting. In the story, the author described heaven as a situation where someone would understand all that happened in one's life, specifically those events that really bothered that person throughout his or her life and was not able to find the answers at the time when he or she was alive. The specific events may seem not significant at first, but as the person meets the five people who has been affected by that person's single action (conscious or unconscious) and realizes what his or her action has done to them, the person will then be enlightened, thus, the feeling of peace will blanket his or her soul. It's like being in a state of equilibrium: where there are no unbalanced forces crowding in one's mind about what one thought has happened and what really has happened. It's also like having a glimpse of God's view, where one knows and understands the string which connects everyone.

I really loved this book. Not the kind of religious books where someone is preaching you and you always nod and say "Amen". I recommend you read this (And I'm planning to buy and read it again) :)

grabbed it from a friend's bloggie...a very beautiful poem...

A Life That Matters

Ready or not, someday it will come to an end.
There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours or days.
All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten will pass to someone else.
Your wealth, fame and temporal power shall shrivel to irrelevance.
Your grudges, resentments, frustrations and jealousies will finally disappear.

So too, your hopes, ambitions, plans and to-do lists will expire.
The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.
It won’t matter where you came from, or on what side of the tracks you lived at the end.
It won’t matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant.
Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant.

So what will matter? How will the value of your days be measured?
What will matter is not what you bought, but what you built;
Not what you got, but what you gave.
What will matter is not your success, but your significance.
What will matter is not what you learned, but with what you taught.

What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion, courage or sacrifice
that enriched, empowered or encouraged others to emulate your example.
What will matter is not your competence, but your character.
What will matter is not how many people you knew, but how many will feel a lasting loss when you’re gone.
What will matter is how long you will be remembered by whom and for what.

Living a life that matters doest happen by accident.
It’s not a matter of circumstance but choice.
Choose to live a life that matters.

Author Unknown


Thursday, August 03, 2006

Pers Taym


1. Kaninang papunta ako ng skul galing sa workie, sumakay ako ng MRT with my opismeyt Sarah. Dahil sa wala na kaming maupuan sa bandang unahan ng tren, inalok kami ni manong driver (as in driver ng MRT) na humawak sa upuan niya kasi wala na kaming estribo na mahawakan. Naexperience namin ang driver's view. Hangandaaaaa pala ng nasa unahan at nagadrive. Parang panaginip. Lahat ng bagay na bumubulaga sa akin dumadagdag sa kagandahan ng view. Ultimo kalawang ng riles, ang mga graba, mga daan na katabi, mga sasakyan, mga manong na naglilinis ng railings ng tren. Lahat-lahat. At sa pagkakataong iyon, nakaramdam ako ng kapayapaan ng loob sa gitna ng maingay at matuling pamumuhay ng lungsod...





2. Hindi ko alam na may sakayan ng UP pala pagkababang-pagkababa ko ng MRT sa Quezon Ave. Station. Basta puro damo yung daanan, tapos kailangang tumawid ng tulay papunta sa jeep mismo. May nakita kami ni Sarah Potpot na kakaiba at talagang nakagugulat. 'Kala nga namin nung una ay mga basahan ng mop, dagdag pa na kakulay nila ang MARUMING basahan ng mop. Nung nakita namin ng malapitan, mga lalaking kambing pala. Matapos naming magulat ni Sarah, sabay din kaming nandiri. Basta hindi sila nicey makita. Yung katawan kasi nila parang nababalutan ng maraming-maraming MARUMING dreadlocks. As in. May palagay nga ako na marahil pakiramdam ng mga kambing na yun eh tupa sila. NAGPAPANGGAP na tupa. ;) Pero para maiba, pinadreadlocks nila yung balahibo nila. Para mas astig. Pero ewwww parin. ;)

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Sa Alaala ni Baby Spice

LSS (Last Song Syndrome) ako sa kanta ni Emma Bunton, Take My Breath Away. Naalala ko bigla nung nasa pantry kami sa opis ng mga opismeyts ko. Dahil sa "isfayci chikon" ni Ate, nabuksan ang usapan tungkol sa Spice Girls at napagkasunduan namin na maging "ISFAYCI GURLS": Aira as Ginger Isfayci, Sarah as Scary Isfayci, Armelle as Posh Isfayci, Liv as Sporty Isfayci, at ako as Baby Isfayci (Kati baby pa ato ;p ). In fairness, isfayci talaga ang chickon ni Ate. Ahehe. Eto nga pala ang kanta ni Baby Isfayci nung nagkahiwa-hiwalay na sila ng Isfayci Gurls.



Take My Breath Away
Written by Emma Bunton/Steve Mac/Wayne Hector

Yeah, if I told you how I feel about you
Would you say the same
And if I wrote it in a letter
Would you keep it or throw it away
I never thought I'd feel the way I'm feeling lately
When everything you seem to do
Just drives me crazy

Every waking day, you take my breath away
With every word you say
You take my breath away
You look at me that way, baby come what may
I hope that you'll always know
How to take my breath away
How to take my breath away




If you told me how you feel about me
Things I did not know
If you said you'd fill my heart with all your love
Until it overflows
I don't know the way you feel
But boy I'm hoping
I always used to hide away but now I'm open

Every waking day, you take my breath away
With every word you say
You take my breath away
You look at me that way, baby come what may
I hope that you'll always know
How to take my breath away
How to take my breath away




Take my breath away, take my breath away
Take my breath away
Every waking day, you take my breath away
With every word you say
You take my breath away
You look at me that way, baby come what may
I hope that you'll always know
How to take my breath away
How to take my breath away

Take my breath away, take my breath away
Take my breath away
Take my breath away
Take my breath away, take my breath away

PANIC MODE

Yez, panic mode na talaga ako. Andami-dami kong dapat gawin sa skul na hindi ko pa nagagawa. Nahihiya na ako sa pakner ko at siya ang sumasalo sa akin sa mga programming chuvanez namin. Hay.
At anong ginagawa ko ?
ITINUTULOG KO LANG.
Taenang buhay to o.
At taenang internet connection to, tinalo pa si Kuya Cesar sa kabagalan sa pagsasalita.
Will somebody kick my ass??!

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Will Miss You Guys


Baby Bien
  • A.K.A. Francis
  • Ang halos lagi kong kasabay sa bus pauwi (kung papunta siyang Ortigas Ilalim)
  • Mahilig sa musika tulad ko (Though mejo hindi siya tinatakwil ng musika, di gaya ko)
  • Halos laging quota (stats!stats!stats!)
  • Ang batang probinsiyano na tinuruan ko ng kamunduhan..este ng bagay-bagay tungkol sa Maynila (Kay gara-gara ng Maynila!)
  • Forever benta ang popcorn and kabaklaan jokes ko (ang babaw mo p're ;p)
  • "Matutuloy" raw kami kung hindi lang daw siya nagnight-shift (NOW what do mean by this baby?;p )
  • Chemical eng'g (matakot ka!)


Aira
  • Aira as Aira
  • Kasabay kong nagsusunbathing ng magbuhos ang Diyos ng kabaklaan at katarantaduhan sa mundo
  • Hindi ko lang kawave (11) kundi kawavelength pa (633nm), harharhar!
  • Ang batang kulang ng 10 araw, in short, ABNOY! (sabay palipit ng leeg)
  • Malaki ang hinaharap (literally and figuratively)
  • Ang Dakilang Manggagaya (Persin!Perpisis!Laykley!Recentley!Understeynding!Verooo-nica!)
  • One of the boys (at laging hinahabol ng boys)
  • Biochemistry ang calling ng lola mo


Kristen
  • Kristen as Kristen
  • Ang kasabay ko pauwi kapag magkikita sila ng bf niya sa Monumento (uiiiii~)
  • Ang babaeng natusok ang mata ng straw (tanga-tanga..hehehe)
  • Epitome of the word WORKAHOLIC (1 full time job and 1 part time, kamusta naman?!natutulog ka pa ba???)
  • Pumapasok ng may chikinini sa leeg, harharhar!


Mga walanghiya kayo, ganyanan na pala, iwanan na. Hmmf. Panight-night shift pa kasi eh. Lumalabas mga tunay niyong katauhan: takot kayo sa liwanag. Mga Aswang! Nagkakalat ng lagim sa gabi sa pamamagitan ng kanilang mga pamatay at malalamig na tinig, binibiktima ang mga walang muwang na business at household chuvanez sa kabilang panig ng daigdig! Harharhar...(Pindutin ang mga larawan para makita ang mga salarin)

Isa lang ang masasabi ko sa inyo: Mamimiss niyo ako. Pramis. Itusok niyo man sa chickenballs at squidballs ni Aling Tess sa tapat ng Jollibee.